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THE KIELTY KONSIDERATION - June 24, 2022

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THE KIELTY KONSIDERATION - June 24, 2022

Another week with minimal good vibrations on the national front. Gas prices are through the roof, grocery prices are chasing them up the inflation ladder and the pure diabolical evil of the tribal neanderthals under red “MAGA” caps being called out on daytime television makes the Depp-Heard trial look like a student council debate. I know that not all Republicans are hard-hearted, rock throwing simpletons who have bought into what the entire rational nation has acknowledged as “The Big Lie,” but for all those not threatening elected officials and senior citizens with profane chants and threats of violence now might be the time to stand up. Seems relatively simple to me. You can either take a stand for your political party and put an end to “MAGA” inspired thickheaded gullibility or reserve your seat next to flat earth proponents, Big Foot experts and the dim-witted quasi Americans who believe that Ivanka Trump’s Capitol Hill testimony was delivered by a government sanctioned lookalike on the boat into history. The choice is yours. Bon voyage.


-No longer being subjected to the distinct hell of commuting by automobile in and out of Metro Boston I have not kept up on my podcast listening, despite being a fan of the medium. I feel it is ideally suited to a captive audience but I have recently re-embraced the form while doing household chores and this one has got my ears. "Fly On The Wall,” with Dana Carvey and David Spade" is well-titled and the rapport between Carvey and Spader bumps right up to the baseline of "Inside Baseball" without ever falling foul. The lineup of guests recalling their experiences on “Saturday Night Live” includes such cast legends as Mike Myers, Tina Fey, and Chris Rock and such notable hosts as Tom Hanks, Judd Apatow, and Drew Barrymore. I have heard three this far that run the range of "Fly On The Wall" guests. Sarah Silverman, who was hired as a writer at 22 and did only one-year as a cast member and whom both Carvey and Spade treat with affectionate younger sister respect even when Silverman puts them on their laughing heels when she refers to a teenage friend's mother as a "fucking cunt;" Bill Hader (among my favorite entertainers in anything) who they very much treat like a brother from the same fraternity who was in the house during a different time period but for whom the landmarks remain familiar to all three; and Jon Hamm, who the hosts are quite obviously in awe of (it's Jon fucking Hamm for goodness sake) but he is disarming and very locked into their vibe for an entertaining episode. Through my limited listening, I have found the chemistry between Carvey and Space puts their guests readily at ease which alongside their industry insights makes for a truly fun listen.   

-The Roman Catholic Church never seems to have to look very far for their next ad hoc public relations specialist and their latest hero sprang up from Worcester, MA. Bishop Robert J. McManus took it upon himself last week to revoke Catholic status from the Nativity School of Worcester for the high crime against humanity of… flying both a Gay Pride and a Black Lives Matter flag over the building. Apparently Fr. McRighteous is still working off the Coptic Calendar which proved useless in alerting him to the fact that June is both Gay Pride Month and that the Federal holiday, Juneteenth, was just around the corner. Not to mention that he’s also far enough out of touch with his boss that he missed the memo when Pope Francis said in a letter to LGBTQ Catholics last month that God “does not disown any of his children.” Fr. McKnucklehead has in the past voiced such saintly opinions as the thought that Black Lives Matter gave voice to “factions which also instill broad-brush distrust of police” and that he opposed the Gay Pride flag as welcoming “queer affirming” and “trans affirming” elements. The real head scratcher here is that Diocese of Worcester is tuition free and is entirely funded by individuals, foundations, and corporations, none of whom presumably had a problem with the flags.

Outside of some needless bad publicity for the Church and a strike against him in the, “Judge not, lest ye be judged,” column at the pearly gates this seems to be another example of a religious figure mouthing off simply because he has a built-in audience.

-Far be it from politics to allow religion to have all the small-minded fun, and if it’s Texas you can count on some spiteful cruelty, as well. How else to explain Lone Star State Republicans voting at their state-wide convention to ratify the nation’s thoughts on their collective intelligence by formally rejecting President Joe Biden's election in 2020 as illegitimate after establishing the dummy baseline by confronting a war hero who happens to be an elected member of their party? Prior to their collective denial of a failed insurrection that has inspired 30 of their courageous party mates to take the 5th rather than incriminate themselves a group of these imbecilic dolts confronted Representative, Dan Crenshaw, a former Navy Seal who lost his right eye in a roadside bomb blast during a deployment in Afghanistan. Among the bon mots these simple-minded dullards threw at a celebrated member of their side was, “Eyepatch McCain,” (a Tucker Carlson original) and “Globalist RINO (Republican In Name Only).” Even Democrats were quick to defend Crenshaw and condemn his vicious hecklers while his own Congressional big wig, House Minority Leader, and proud owner of the most rubbery of spines, Kevin McCarthy, was characteristically silent. If there was any doubt left regarding this assembly qualifying for a Guinness World Record for largest gathering of identifiable idiots they clinched it and took a collective bow by concluding the weekend on a party platform decrying homosexuality as an, "abnormal lifestyle choice.” They may very well grow them bigger in Texas but they most definitely do not grow them brighter.

-Finally, in what is begging to be come a weekly component of, “The Kielty Consideration,” we once again welcome a priceless quote highlighting the brilliance of our modern day, Einstein, Republican candidate for Senate, Hershel Walker. While holding fast to his refusal to debate Democratic opponent, Stacey Abrams, he could not help but remind voters of is his certifiably MAGA level stupidity when she stated, “I am tired of hearing about Georgia being the best state in the country to do business when we are the worst state in the country to live.” Walker’s astute response: “If it’s the worst state, why are you here? Why don’t you leave ― go to another? There’s, what, 51 other states that you can go to.” The question this failure of a 3rd grade level fact about his beloved country raises is, which of Walker’s admitted multiple personalities is the dumbest. Perhaps it was the one who when asked about his mental health responded with this biblical volley, “"Do our Lord Jesus Christ have a mental illness because he said he's the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit? To me, those are three different personalities.” None of those personalities is believed to have fathered three children out of wedlock by three different women that they then didn’t recognize or acknowledge until running for office.

-As if this week didn't give Satan enough reasons to smile we got this gem from one of his favorite sons. "Today’s ruling is a watershed win for good men and women all across America and is the result of a decades-long fight the NRA has led," Wayne LaPierre, the executive vice president of the National Rifle Association, said in a statement Thursday after a loaded Supreme Court basically said "Uvalde didn't mean dick, our supporters already had plans for their NRA money."   

-At least Britney is back on Instagram!

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